Silence is Serenity

So...my boyfriend joined the Army. I am terrified, proud, upset, confused, worried. I'm pretty much a mess over it. I am so afraid of him getting hurt, of becoming some one I don't know. Of being broken. We find out Wednesday when he goes to basics. We've been talking about getting married in the next year and a half to two years. His mom is excited for that. So am I. I want to marry him, I want to spend my life with him. I mean, I love him. I truly do. And I miss him like crazy. It's been a bad morning. I miss my godmother. The fact that she won't be able to be at my wedding, won't get to hug me and tell me she's proud of me...it hurts. I have so much going on in my life right now, amazing things, and I feel so lost because she's not here to share it with me. And I hate it, I fucking hate that she's gone. Her birthday is in 11 days. It's going to be sad day. I'm going to be a mess. I'm still so broken inside because of it. Losing her was...

Wow, it has been a really long time since I updated on here. Angel, what can I say? I am in love with that man. The week I spent with him for his birthday was the best week of my life. And that's saying something because I've got some pretty good memories. Now, we're counting down the days until my birthday because he'll be here with me. 52 days. I honestly can't wait to see him again. Even though he's joining the army after my birthday and I am so completely terrified that he's going to get hurt or worse. :/ I just want him to come home, safe, to me. And I will still be here, waiting for him, as always, when he gets home. I love him and there is no way in hell I am going to abandon him like some heartless bitch. And don't give me that "it's hard" bullshit. NOTHING IN LIFE WORTH HAVING COMES EASY AND LOVE IS ALWAYS WORTH FIGHTING FOR. That's all there is to that. If you don't have the strength to fight for someone, to wait for them,...