I'm not okay

I keep looking at the day and just...falling apart. 5 days from now, the one man I truly loved was supposed to ask me to marry him. At least, that's what he told my mother in September. 8 days from now, I was supposed to be moving. I was supposed to be moving to Texas to live with him. I was supposed to be happy.
I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of the constant pain. I just want to let go, move on completely and never look back.

Fuck. Everything.